Is it possible that our plans are too much, what we want is not what we need, we don't deserve anything in life, and our expectations are too high? I know that sounds like "life sucks, accept it", but that's not what I am trying to say at all. I find myself pondering this a lot lately. Is my bar set too high? Do I expect too much from others? If I relaxed and expected nothing would that be better than expecting too much?
What I have come down to is this, God will provide - believing that is just as important as seeing it happen before your eyes. It sounds simple, but it really boils "making life easier" down to one simple truth. Why do we doubt it so often? If something does not go according to plan, I need to roll with it. Sometimes the unplanned is a better story and more exciting. If I do not get what I wanted, I need to be thankful for getting what I need - I have never been without food, shelter, or clothing. If something happens that I do not deserve, I need to remember all the blessings I have been given over the years and the community I am surrounded by. And if something does not meet my expectations, I need to go with it.
Hind sight is 20/20, and in the moment there is validity in being hurt, but we need to learn to go through life without a chip on our shoulder. We have the capability to move forward in every situation, but we give that up when our pride gets in the way of our reasoning. Do not waste your life mad at the world, frustrated with others, and trying to prove your point. Time will fly and you will regret. While guarding your heart is a good thing, live with an open heart and open hands.
It is so easy to lose sight of who we are and what we hold most dear and to get caught up in our own frustrations. We walk into something we want to look a certain way and it looks different than we expected and instead of engaging with the new people and new situation we pull back and hesitate and sell the situation short. Even if we do not like something or someone we can learn about humanity or life through any situation. We can grow through simply observation and do not need to engage our mouths to engage our heads and our hearts. I'm taking this to heart in my own life and realizing that in every situation we have opportunity to be new and present.
Sorry for my ramblings... I am processing this as I type... God works in mysterious ways often and this is one of the things he is capturing in me to work on in the not so distant future. I pray often for strength to stretch in this way. If you know me personally, hold me accountable.