No matter how hard I fight it, a new year always motivates me to get certain parts of my life together. I truly believe that we should be constantly re-evaluating and growing, but that does not seem to make this desire within me go away when January 1st hits to start working out, eating better, reading more, cooking more, and complaining less. I will make it a goal (not a resolution ;) to do this on the first of every month, instead of just the first of the year.
It seems to always come back to intentionality with me, but not in the way that I was groomed to see it. Have you ever met someone that is exactly as socially awkward as they were ten years previously and you think how sad it is for them? What room do people have to judge who have not moved forward spiritually, mentally, physically, or in all other areas to feel bad for someone socially. Often times, our social conduct is how we are brought up, and it the most difficult to fight. Being spiritually stagnant is just as bad as being socially stagnant. I have taken a step back from this issue recently and realized I have been pitying those who are less comfortable than I, when I have room for improvement in all areas. My relationship with God could be closer, I could be challenging myself academically even though I am finished with my degree, I could be working out more and eating better, and I could give more people a chance despite appearances.
The positive thing is that once denial is removed and we realize how much room there is to improve, motivation creeps in. Regardless of extenuating circumstances, we can always personally decide to change ourselves and need no one else’s approval. It is a big thing to tackle, and I know I hold the people I hold most dear to a very high standard, but I never want someone to sell themselves short. I hold myself to just as high a standard and aim to become a better person as I transition into my adult life.
Everyone has the ability to start right where they are and stop comparing themselves to everyone else. Our journeys and stories are designed to be different. Draw inspiration from those differences, and stop feeling inferior. God created us each to walk in ways that will weave in and out of others lives and he designed others lives to weave in and out of ours. We are not designed to fit some Hollywood mold or be a cookie cutter person. I am learning to walk in the understanding that I am not going to be a lot of things, but I cannot let envy move into my heart. Other people are envious of something you have. Try to remember that and treat your talents and skills with the respect that they deserve, because God designed us this way for a purpose beyond our comprehension.